We have a confession to make. There’s a reason why we have not been writing and delivering coherent, excellent and up-to-date film news to your computer screens…..we all have jobs! That is until Tuesday afternoon when one of your wise men got his wise ass laid-off! On the bright side here comes another Top 10 based on the very best unemployed film characters we could think of……..Now I’m going to go make myself a tin of baked beans.
1. The Dude, The Big Lebowski
It’s hard to describe. I shouldn’t idealise this man, but I do. Chilled, relaxed and keeping it together…for now anyway. Seems like unemployment suits The Dude. Lets just hope he gets his briefcase back. We wouldn’t want his “papers going missing”.
While being a member of the bowling team, the Dude is the only one never seen bowling throughout the movie.
2. Sonny Koufax, Big Daddy
Ya see what I mean? Who would have time to make/buy/rent a scuba outfit to teach his semi-adopted son a lesson? Not an employed father that’s who! Sonny knows what’s what and he don’t need no stinking job to tell him otherwise.
Bill Murray and Jack Nicholson were considered for the role of Sonny.
3. Gaz, The Full Monty
We’re in Sheffield; steel industry has gone down the shitter, does Gaz and pals just step aside and let ‘them chippendale poofs’ take centre stage? Hell no! Lets face it, it’s not your average run of the mill job but at least he’s trying and technically speaking he becomes self-employed. Gaz has actually stepped up.
At no stage do they perform what they have rehearsed, or rehearse what they eventually perform.
4. Spud, Trainspotting
Here is an example of a young, ambitious British man trying to get a job. Sure he went about it the wrong way, and he faked his identity, and he was actually trying to not get the job, but the potential employers don’t know that.
Ewan McGregor was open to injecting himself with heroin, to better understand Renton’s character. He later decided against it.
5. Chris Gardner, The Pursuit of Happiness
Chris Gardner: ambitious, young, caring, has the world on shoulders and has a collage of bad fucking days. However, this try hard-daddy has the right idea and luckily enough he gets what he wants…..but he pretty much crawls through dog shit to get there.
The real Chris Gardner shows up at the end of the film when Will Smith and his son walk into the distance.
6. Brennan Huff & Dale Doback, Step Brothers
Our first unemployed duo and boy do they do unemployed well! It turns out at the end of this film that these two had great entrepreneurial minds. This was evident with the huge success of Prestige World Wide but the journey getting there was truly the best part. GRREEEUUHHHH (impression of Brennan wearing a Chewbacca mask)
The fake testicles that Will Ferrell used were worth around $20,000 and presented to him as a wrap present.
7. Lester Burnham, American Beauty
What happened to Lester is what I believe a lot of us are still waiting for. That moment when you just do not give a fuck anymore. Fuck the job, fuck the car, fuck the dick head next door and so on. Beside he had more important things to deal with anyway.
The following was his unemployed shopping list:
- Get a reliable pot dealer ☑
- Get stacked ☑
- Buy car of my dreams ☑
- Seduce and/or try and nail my daughters seductive, hot best friend ☑
- Stand up to wife and catch her necking a twat ☑
See? his checklist wasn’t even that long. Now this is a bloke who has his life in order.
When Lester throws the asparagus, he was supposed to throw it on the floor. The reactions of Annette Bening and Thora Birch are genuine.
8. William ‘D-Fens’ Foster, Falling Down
We love this guy. For him his day just got worse and worse and worse. However, Bill did what any of us would do when you have a bad day – you lose the fucking plot and you smash up a shop, shoot up a phone box and back chat absolutely everyone….unemployed lad!
Michael Douglas considers this his favourite performance of all the movies he has been in.
9. Jay and Silent Bob, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
This is our second and final duo. A tough one as we weren’t really sure if these guys are actually unemployed. Strictly speaking they make money by selling dope. However after extensive research we came to the conclusion that they probably don’t get taxed on it, plus selling dope isn’t working, it’s giving back to the community, sort of like being a social worker. Anyway, great cast, great film and plenty of action so be sure to check these two guys out!
Ben Affleck and Matt Damon mention that one of the reasons to do a film is because they owe the director a favour. It was writer/director Kevin Smith who brought the script ofGood Will Hunting (1997) to Miramax.
10. Ernie, Scarface
Probably the shortest amount of time anyone has been unemployed, we’re talking 15 seconds tops but, unemployed nonetheless. Ernie really dodged a bullet (literally) in this scene but he’s a loyal chico and with that he makes our Top 10.
Tony’s “little friend” is an M16 assault rifle with an M203 40mm grenade launcher attached to the barrel.
So we wrap up another Top 10. It’s been an emotional ride, a cleansing ride, a sobering ride and in someways an inspiring ride. Ahhh who am I kidding, we just enjoy the unemployed in films.
Be sure to check out some of our other Top 10’s like….